Understanding Your Limitations

It’s difficult to come to a point in your life where you encounter a limitation.  Even one limitation or a “Uh oh…I can’t do that,” is a very real disappointment to me.  The past 3 years have proved to us that we have those “I am unable to do that bla bla bla…”  And, it’s disheartening to say the least, particularly if you’ve been a Type A person all your life!

Richard and I have met our match on some things in this process of life and dying, and we’re not too darned happy about it at all.  This past weekend we traveled a lot of miles to a customer’s site to do work that involved both of us and our skill-sets.  (At least what USED TO BE our skill-sets).  We managed about 2 hours of honest to God work before we both collapsed in a heap in our hotel room.  We passed the baton on to our capable employees, and had a heart to heart talk about limitations. 

Interesting, but a good friend sent a book to us called God’s Promises for your every needs…I opened this little book up and it just opened straight to a section “What to do when you have a physical sickness” – page 156.  I’ve never considered myself “religious” but these days, I’d say “spiritual” might be a fair description of how I’m feeling.  I gotta tell you, when the book fell open to that page, my jaw dropped. 

It is post-game time.  We’re not in charge of this game of life.  We have just been bit-players.  And here are the questions we asked ourselves last Tuesday as we faced up to the facts of our lives and deaths:  Have we talked straight?  Did we demonstrate respect?  Create transparency?  Have we righted wrongs?  Have we shown loyalty to those who deserve?  Did we deliver results and get better at it?   Are we confronting reality?  Do we clarify expectations?  Have we practiced accountability?  Did we listen first?  Have we kept our commitments?  Did we extend trust?

Answer: Probably not always.  But, once we put it out there to reflect upon, maybe we’ll do better at it.  Wanna’ bet?!  We only have a little bit of time on earth to do these things – and yes, I think that it can be accomplished.  Sometimes we just need to listen to that little guy that sits on our shoulder that we have ignored in the past.

There’s nothing fun about the process of dying.  But, I’m personally grateful for the time to reflect a bit on the past, remember beauty that I’ve experienced, love that I have been bestowed, and appreciate the opportunity to face myself and express my love to those in my life who I truly love. 

It appears that last week Richard had a couple of “mini” strokes.  I realized it fairly clearly on Wednesday morning when we awoke and his right eye was drooping, he was talking out of the left side of his mouth, he has no strength in his right arm and hand, and leg.  He’s keeping his senses about him and we aren’t panicking, but we see the writing on the wall ever so much clearly now.  It’s easy to be frightened.  But it’s also easy to say, “I love you, and I’m with you – no matter what.”

Living with Strength

Our lives have taken a 180 degree turn over the past three years – – one of the major problems we encounter with heavy metal poisoning (uranium and tungsten with the dash of arsenic) is fatigue.  This is the opposite of strength and the exact opposite of the way both of us have lived the majority of our lives.

Throw in the towel?  How many times have we thought that would be the answer...

Throw in the towel? How many times have we thought that would be the answer…

We have a friend who has lived for years with a terrible disability and chronic pain.  She has never “thrown in the towel,” and I so admire her courage and strength inspite of all the roadblocks she encounters at every turn of the road.  Surgeries, botched surgeries, embedded new-fangeled gadgets to keep her going…and she keeps a gentle smile on her face every time I’ve seen her.  She is Living with Strength. 

There are so many people around us who are dealing with incredible challenges with a smile.  At times I’m ashamed of my whining.  Particularly when I meet someone such as this friend of ours.  She is an inspiration to us.

Living with chronic conditions involving pain and medicines to keep the pain from making you grind your teeth is an ugly and frightening thing.  There’s no getting around it sometimes.  I try to keep this in mind when I am around someone who is ticking me off, “acting out,” or being an SOB.  It’s possible the person I’m dealing with is going through their own pain.  Like the old saying, “walk a mile in someone else’s shoes, and then perhaps you will understand.” 

That’s a very wise saying, and I’ll try to remember it!

Wings of Life and Beauty

Wings of Beauty

Wings of Beauty

Credit for photo – beautiful web-site! 

 

A very special lady, Jean, shared this beautiful video clip below from youtube with me – I’m blogging it in hopes that you will enjoy it as much as we do!

 – –  Wings of Life – –

http://www.youtube-nocookie.com/embed/xHkq1edcbk4?rel=0 

 

Moonlit Night in the Desert

Last night Richard and I prepared to take a short journey out in the desert by sleeping most of the day.  So, at about 6pm we had the physical energy to drop by Silly Al’s for a $13.00 pizza (big splurge these days!) and we headed south to the vast, now empty spaces in the desert. 

Our Mysterious Moon

Our Mysterious Moon

Earlier this week we found out that last night the moon was going to be closer to our earth than ever before, and we wanted to take a good look at it.  WOW!  It is was incredible and beyond beautiful hanging out in the middle of nowhere watching the moon move across our vision…

Check out this website and you’ll see some fabulous photos. And these guys have a lot of information about the moon too….

Last night reminded me of a terrific “star party” that we went to up in Sedona, Arizona.  It was filled to the brim with astronomy students, teachers, and just us novice star gazers.  We had a great time with our friends, Skeeter and Angela and their son who was just getting interested in star gazing. 

How lucky we are to have seen the beauty of the planets – everyone at this star party shared their astronomy equipment – some very high-tech and expensive viewers and some crazy home-made telescopes.

Last night was known as the “Super Moon.”  And it lived up to it’s name!

Desert Fox

I hope pizza doesn’t make foxes sick to their stomachs!  These little guys who joined the party last night had a great feast…

Oh yes, I did mention pizza, and that turned out to be a   great addition to the evening star gazing.  We were able to eat pizza (which is pretty rare for us).  As we got down to the crusts – we would toss them out in the floor of the desert for the critters to eat . . . not realizing that the critters were hungry that very moment! 

Within minutes of tossing pizza crusts, two foxes arrived on the scene to snatch, grab, run, eat, and return for more.  Brave little guys; coming right up to us within several feet.  I wasn’t sure if we should be nervous or not.  What other hungry scavenger was going to visit us next?

It was a simple night of entertainment and an opportunity to look at nature from several perspectives.  All that for $13.00.  Not bad.

Thanks for the Present from Halo!

Deli The Nasher came into our lives through the pound.  Reason for the “pick?”  On-line pics of the adorable animals looking for homes were filled with gorgeous and beautiful kittens, cats, and dogs…I scrolled the kitten page to the very end, found the homliest looking kitten (last one – of course).  We picked her out and broke speed barriers to the SPCA.  The folks there immediately took our money, had her “fixed” and we picked Deli The Nasher up the next afternoon.

Temptations for Deli the Nasher

Temptations for Deli the Nasher

Since her introduction to our household, Deli the Nasher has managed to put all electrical circuits, cords, wires, and stuff I didn’t know even existed – – completely out of service.  She is totally addicted to low voltage current….nashing away at it like a crack-head in need of a quick fix… Deli has a special long-distance friend, Halo the Wonder Dog.  Halo’s mistress Ann assisted Halo in selecting something new for Deli to chew on…irresistable for Deli and many thanks to Halo the Wonder Dog!

Over the past several months Deli and Halo have exchanged letters and emails (who said Mistress Ann and Patti are sane people?!).   I guess you could say we are enablers to all other animal lovers who go bonkers over their beloved friends…

Deli got a few btes of “Temptation Treats,”  and in 10 minutes she completely conked out.  Thanks to Halo the Wonder Dog, Deli had a wonderful morning.  All that eating put her straight to sleep. 

What is it about our pets?  We love them no matter what…they can pull off some awful stunts and cost us a ton of money in trying to keep up with remediating their damage.  And if you spank them – you feel awful.

Deli sleeping it off

Deli – conked out after her “Temprations” snack